Do the Hard Things

hardthings

Today is a hard day.  Today I have to do something that I dread.  Just the thought of it makes my stomach queasy and my heart race.  To other people what I have to do today may not seem hard, but for me, it is one of the hardest…

It doesn’t matter what it is, to me this is a hard thing.  It is something that I have to do, in fact I am required by law to do, but that doesn’t make it any easier.  This thing fills me with so much fear that I avoided doing it for a whole year and then it caught up with me and now it is even harder.  I had hoped that by sticking my head in the sand and flying under the radar that I could go on living in denial, but things don’t happen that way, eventually it catches up with you.

When we do the hard things we actually free ourselves.  When we avoid the hard things they become like chains around our necks and they drag us down.  I thought that by ignoring this particular hard thing, my life would be easier…but it wasn’t.  I didn’t sleep properly, I worried constantly and there was always this haunting feeling surrounding me, waiting for the other shoe to drop and then it did and it was bad and now I have to live with the consequences.

I pride myself on the way I face up to my responsibilities, even when they are hard, but in this one area I failed.  Instead of doing the hard thing, I hid from it and my hard-fought integrity took a hit.  I allowed the fear to rule me, I allowed the fear to win.  I allowed the fear of the hard thing to stain my character and to rob me of my honesty and integrity.  I allowed fear to change me.

Change that is born from fear is never a good thing.  When fear dictates your actions, it eats away at you little by little until all that remains is a husk of your former self.  Fear steals the very essence of who you are and robs you of your potential.  Do the hard things.

Doing the hard thing strengthens you, it reinforces your character and integrity and it changes you…for the better.  With every decision to do the hard thing when you could do the easy thing, you become a better person, a better partner, a better student, a better spouse, a better human being.  Doing the hard thing makes your life easier.

And when you’ve done that hard thing, when you have faced your fear and stood your ground…reward yourself.  Give yourself a pat on the back and say, “Well done” because doing the hard thing isn’t easy and we need to be proud of ourselves when we stand up to our fears.  You’ve done a hard thing, now be kind to yourself…chocolate helps.

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Building a Dream

31 Days of Blogging – Day 18

dreams

 

I feel so bad…I didn’t blog yesterday.  The day just seemed to get away from me and then by the time I remembered, I was already in bed and far too tired to do anything about it!  So I am going to blog twice today to make up for it.

I sometimes feel that I am being spied on and although I have a very active imagination, this is not a paranoia thing.  It is actually like someone can read my mind or overhear my conversations. I am really getting sick of it.

I have always said that I am an ideas person…I am always coming up with ideas for new things to do.  My dad was the same.  I remember as a kid having a discussion with him about how to go about making an airbed out of the bladders used for cask wine.  He had it all worked out, the only drawback was the noise.  Anyway, that is a bit off track.  My problem is not with coming up with the ideas, just ask my husband, I am always chewing off his ear with an ideas.  No the problem I have is making them a reality.

When I get an idea, the finished product is very clear, what isn’t clear are the steps to bring it to fruition.  I can get quite obsessed about something, like this time I came up with an idea for an iphone app.  I created a working excel spreadsheet (that I use all the time for work) that I want to make into an app so that it is at my fingertips, but the whole process of creating an app eludes me.  I have googled it, but haven’t found much to help me and to pay to have it made is really expensive…so how do I make it happen?  I don’t know and so it sits on the backburner.

But again, I am off track.  What has this got to do with thinking that I am being spied on?  Well, it’s like this…I come up with an idea for a new menu item at work and before I know it, I see an ad on TV and they have stolen my idea.  Don’t laugh, this has happened to me too numerous times to think of it as coincidence.  And there are other things too, like my idea for the Big Pineapple.

The Big Pineapple is a local tourist attraction that went into receivership and subsequently closed.  It sat unused and unloved for a really long time, the site for sale.  I had a stroke of genius to reopen it as a local market.  Here is my idea that I wrote down so I could prove it was my idea first – The Future of the Big Pineapple. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the money to make this a reality but someone else did.  The Big Pineapple is now a market…not quite the way I imagined it, but none the less, someone made my dream a reality before I could.  I am really over this happening to me.

Last night, it happened again.  Gav & I have been cultivating a boutique range of cold brew coffee.  As you can see in previous posts, we make it and bottle it ourselves and then sell it in our shops.  We have been looking at ways to expand and were thinking of doing a market stall.  Last night I received a text from a friend showing me someone who has just started selling cold brew at the markets.  ARGH!  That was my idea and someone stole it!

So, you tell me, am I being spied on and my secrets being sold to the highest bidder?  I just want to know, when will it be my turn to build my dream?  I have some really brilliant ideas, but due to lack of funds/knowledge/time I never get to make them a reality…I really want to make them a reality.  I really need an investor, someone who has the things I lack to make my dreams come true.  Anybody out there willing to invest in a middle aged mother who is just trying to have a go?